Tuesday, March 15, 2005

How to Find Information and Entertainment for Married Adults

A male dog is called a DOG, a female dog is called a BITCH. A male ass is called a JACK, a female ass is called a JENNY. A male teal is called a DRAKE, a female teal is called a DUCK.

I can feel you, dear Superblog!! visitor, looking at me with something resembling awe. How can I possibly know these things? Well, there's no trick to it. It's just a simple trick! You see, my computer is connected to the Internet, so I used it to check out a page on Married Adults.com, a website full of useful information, "for Adults ...Married Adults that is" [sic].

Now, I'm not married, and it would be a far cry to characterize me as an adult, but I still visit this site every single day. (No, that's a lie - this was my first visit. I don't know why I keep making shit up like that.)

Some parts of the site offend my liberal sensibilities. For instance, I don't agree with making fun of Howard Dean, because it is Superblog!!'s stated policy that Dean is a cool motherfucker. But other parts I find indispensible:

The One Year Bible is the key to reading the Bible in one year. The text is divided into daily readings. For each day there is a portion of the Old Testament, the New Testament, the Psalms, and the Proverbs, grouped in consecutive pages. The great thing is, you can start on any day of the year, and 365 days later you will be done. And if you get stuck in the "begets" of the Old Testament, in five or so minutes you'll be reading the New Testament or a Psalm. It never gets boring. [...] So pick up your copy of The One Year Bible today and start reading. It is published by Tyndale and the ISBN number is 0-8423-4608-2.
And I don't know how I've managed to live my life thus far without the aid of Married Adult's sister site Movies Without Nudity!

All men struggle with lust. As a Christian, lust is something I must battle, not simply struggle with. I have taken the stand that I won't knowingly expose myself to nudity in films. I also have a young daughter that I am trying to teach to be modest in an immodest world.

I am a huge movie fan, both watching them in theaters and buying DVDs. I wanted a list I could download to my PDA and refer to on the run. Most websites I refer to address sex and nudity together, but they do not provide a quick reference such as "nudity: yes or no."

You may say, "What about language and violence?" Well, they aren't the same kind of struggle for me as lust is. Frankly, I don't curse, and I don't beat people up. Too many men struggle with addiction to pornography. Nudity in movies is just the jumping-off point.
With the help of this site (and God), I found out that Sideways contains nudity, whereas Elektra doesn't. Thus, I will of course watch Elektra. To think I might have accidentally watched Sideways and been turned on! But Movies Without Nudity saved me. Thank you, lovely website (and God)!

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