Tuesday, February 08, 2005

Girls Bake Cookies for Asshole Neighbor, Get Sued

You know how Superblog!! has been saying for years, "Don't do anything nice! Because people are assholes, and it will just come back to haunt you"? Well, once again we've been proven right:

DURANGO, Colo. - Two teenage girls who surprised their neighbors with homemade cookies late one night were ordered to pay nearly $900 in medical bills plus court costs for a woman who says she was so startled that she had to go to the hospital.

"Late one night" = 10:30. If you ask me, these girls were asking for trouble:

They made packages with a half-dozen cookies each and added large red or pink construction-paper hearts that carried the message, “Have a great night” and were signed with their first initials: “Love, The T and L Club.”

Wanita Renea Young [...] saw “shadowy figures” outside the house banging repeatedly on her door. She yelled, “Who’s there?” but no one answered, and the figures ran away.
Frightened, Young spent the night at her sister’s home, then went to the hospital the next morning because she was still shaking, had an upset stomach and feared she had had a heart attack.

Admittedly, the woman was VERY OLD (49), and possibly senile. The teenagers' families offered to pay her medical bills, but she obviously wanted punitive damages.

Dear Mrs Young, you are Superblog!!'s Bitch of the Week! Hearty congratulations! You can claim your prize in hell.

But really, you have to wonder if these girls were right in the head:

The Denver Post reported Friday that the girls had decided to stay home and bake the cookies rather than go to a dance where there might be cursing and drinking.

Huh? That's the problem right there. When you're a teenager, cursing and drinking, along with making out and sniffing glue, are the corner stones of a healthy life! Again, ignoring that indisputable fact is just asking for trouble!

Superblog 2!! says: Next time, surprise your neighbors with homemade Molotov cocktails


Anonymous said...

very old? 49? heh, you wait til you get that age.. see i was young when i first started downloading your lame ass blog... but by the time it was done.. i was starting on my retirement.

lame blog.. wasn't worth all that god damned time downloading.

get a job, kid.

koala mentala said...

I'll NEVER be 49 and you should get a faster internet connection, Sir or Madam or whatever you are.