Great quotes to inspire, empower and motivate you to live the life of your dreams and become the person you've always wanted to be!

Sometimes I go about in pity for myself, and all the while a great wind is bearing me across the sky.
~Ojibwa Saying~

Satan's Workshop

Hello SUPERBLOG!! fans. Today is Another Day Christmas in Sweden. It's a useless day, as is the 25th. Swedes celebrate Christmas on the 24th and then we basically do nothing until New Year's Eve except shop.

And what we do on Christmas Eve is give each other presents (well, most people. I don't) and eat ham and (wait for it) watch Disney cartoons on television. Really. See, back in the olden days Swedish TV was controlled by Evil Socialists and the only TV shows that were acceptable for kids were, like, low-budget Czech animation. Except on Christmas Eve, when the Walt Disney Christmas Show was aired! And thus was born a truly pathetic tradition, which still lives on in three million sad Swedish households.

The coolest part of the Xmas Show is linked above, courtesy of YouTube. It features talking dolls, a Jolly Fat Man, anus-drilling, Charlie Chaplin, offensive stereotypes and Schubert music. And that fucking chessboard paint has freaked out generations of Swedish kids. Witchcraft!!

A Christmas Gift For You

I hereby dedicate this Christmas to SUPERBLOG!!'s No. 2 fan*, Goo McGoo. That is because she made me a very nice video and I said I was gonna do something for her and I never did. At the time, I fully intended to draw a nice picture or bake her a cake or scan my schlong or something, but it didn't happen, because I'm a fuckup. So: As compensation, Christmas, 2006 belongs to Goo. Nobody else can use it without her permission.

Cultural Caveat: Hanukkah and Kwanzaa and all that shit is still open for everyone. (And I'm led to believe those are way awesomer than Xmas.)

Site of the Day: Free Jewish Singles Dating Services. Just kidding. Here's the Site of the Day: Lilly's perfect big breasts in a Santa outfit. By the way, I ripped off the Santa pic from CBR but that's not a Site of the Day.

Bonus Swedish Language Lesson: "Nu är julen förstörd!" = "Merry Christmas" (ä is pronounced like ae, ö is pronounded like oe or uh).

So. Nu är julen förstörd!

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*A cookie for the person who can guess who SUPERBLOG!!'s No. 1 fan is!

CHRISTMAS IS RUINED

SUPERBLOG!! Entry No. 900. Yeah, there's been a lot of nonsensical and unamusing posts on SUPERBLOG!! recently and Pol Pot Week was a miserable failure and even Christer Fuglesang defied us by not only managing to get off-planet but, against all odds, actually returning safely from space, apparently only slightly brain-damaged. What a blow for SUPERBLOG!!'s staff, who had repeatedly predicted his downfall.

Having said that, I vow to make SUPERBLOG!! great again!! Starting tomorrow. Or maybe next week.

But for now, here's a list of crappy Christmas comedies you can see. Here's another such list. And here's Jimmy Olsen, Dick Hunter. And here's our good friend Dr Light, obsessed with rape it seems.

Laterz, Xmas haterz.

Photo #120: Fucking Pigs!

Made fucking pigs today to celebrate that today is day before day before dipping day. Dipping day is when we dip stuff in pot and this week is pot week so I'm being coherent here.

Tomorrow: day before dipping day.

Happy 898th SUPERBLOG!! Entry

O, my blog is like a red, red rose,
That's newly sprung in June;
O, my blog is like a melodie
That's sweetly played in tune.

Remember to always play this while visiting SUPERBLOG!!

Go Potty!

Mr Pot Week is here! It's here! It's here!

Xmas soon! Coming atcha! NO escape.

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SUPERBLOG!!: Tyranny and love, rolled into 1

That's My Nigger!

I don't give a damn what god you claim, I've seen the innocent that you've slain, On my streets you're just fair game, Like a pig walk to your slaughter, The heat here is so much hotter, And my views won't teeter totter or fluctuate, Step to me you just met your fate, And I'll annihilate, With the skill of a Shogun assassin, Slicing and dicing precise with a passion, In any shape form or fashion, Bring it to my home, Welcome to the danger zone, Cause your attitude's the reason, The triggers keep squeezing, The hunt is on and it's open season.

My forefathers fought and died for this here
I'm stronger than your war of fear
Are we clear?If you step in my hood
It's understood
It's open season

I shall live now. Inshallah...

The Feeling Is Mutual

Son of Hitler Week was originally intended as a one-off joke (we said this was supposed to be Mr Pot Week, remember?), but I suddenly realized the theme fits today's entry like a... like a well-fitting theme.

Because today's entry is dedicated to exposing the depravity of my co-blogger. Have you noticed that Uncle Sammy AKA Hitler Junior accounts for less than 20 percent of all SUPERBLOG!!'s entries recently? It's true! I can prove it with graphs!!

Thus I declare open season on Uncle until such time as he gets off his fat ass and starts blogging good and plentiful! If you see him - shoot!

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SUPERBLOG!!: Wants Uncle Sammy Dead (That's what the headline meant, see. Did you get it before I explained it? Good for you! You are very clever.)

Son of Hitler Week

It's Monday, and the start of a new and surprising SUPERBLOG!! theme.

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SUPERBLOG!!: By And For Boys From Brazil

Herr Hitler's Mountain Home

Hitler Week concludes with a bang! We all know The Adolf had a beautiful mountain home and now we can read all about it, courtesy of the November, 1938 issue of Homes & Gardens Magazine!

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SUPERBLOG!!: Doesn't have a mountain home :-(

Hound and the Fury

Hitler Week continues. Here's the evil tyrant relaxing with his dog Pluto.

YouTube clips of the Day: Captain Marginal and Pablo Picasso: His Amazing Life, two Michael Kupperman cartoons from TV Funhouse.

Hitler in a Hat

Happy Hitler Week, everybody! You know this is your punishment for not responding with enthusiasm when I talked about posting humor pics, right? Well, it is. And I'm seriously contemplating making it Hitler Month. Ooh, and what do you say about 2007: Hitler Year? I see Hitler in your future. Lots of Hitler. You won't be able to go anywhere without running into Hitler. Hitler in a hat.

Site of the Day: Sonic the Hedgehog.

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SUPERBLOG!! and You: As Hats are to Hitler

Khan!

Obey me.

Hold Me While I Explode

I'm so fucking PISSED today I guess it's a good thing it's HITLER WEEK here on SUPERBLOG!!. That's that's that's all i have 2 say.

Mood of the Day: Pissed

Site of the Day: Free Bubble Shooter Online Game. (UPDATE 2006: Bubble game now extra functional)

Spice of the Day: Cinnamon

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SUPERBLOG!!: fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck

Photo #119: Fat Bald Face Eating Birdie

Folks !!! I'm home! Sweeeeeet !!!! I took picture of baldy birdie to celebrate our American visitors. Hi American visitors! How are you today?

Fat Bald Face Eating Birdie was chained and pained in Jungle Park Facility Tourist Eating Attraction in Tenerife. Read abouts the whooooos and whaaaaas now or never.

LAS ÁGUILAS – JUNGLE PARK is a fantastic zoological and botanical park with over 75,000 m² of jungle, over 500 animals, walking paths with tunnels, suspension bridges, waterfalls, lagoons, and caves, as well as free flight shows featuring exotic birds and birds of prey.We offer you an unforgettable experience in which you will discover how wildlife, animals and plants work together to give shape to a dazzling ecosystem in the SOUTH of TENERIFE.

It was an unforgettable experience. Because I was sober and now I can't forget the tortured eyes of the little creatures. I have constant flashbacks and it's like a VCR playing in my head constantly repeating the howls of agony from birdies and baby baboons and you name it.

Lesson learned could be to be drunk even when visiting dazzling ecosystems.

Fucking Posting Hitler Instead

I thought for sure I was gonna post funny photos starting last Sunday and continuing every single day until, like, forever, but since nobody seemed to give a shit, I guess I won't be doing that. Fuck it. I'm fucking posting Hitler instead, and even that's too good for you people.

But here's SUPERBLOG!!'s Site of the Day. It's freaking me out, man.

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SUPERBLOG!!: Fucking Posting Hitler Instead

When the Routine Bites Hard

I have a folder on my desktop called humorbilder. It contains a few hundred images, stolen here and there (mainly from *THE INTERNET*) since 1995. I thought it would be a fun idea to post like an image a day for the next year or so. Or until I get bored. Plus! I'll write a daily essay detailing what that perticulah imyge means to me. How about that? Wouldn't that be fun? Huh? Wouldn't it be FUN?!??!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!??!?!?!

SUPERBLOG!!: Fun

Birdsong Earthbound Loser

Sweden's largest tabloid, The Daily Communist, reports that Christer Fuglesang, would-be astronaut, has once again been thwarted in his pathetic and ill-conceived attempts to leave Mother Earth. The stated reason: Fuglesang is simply too gay for space. And also the clouds are his enemy. (Which incidentally means that THE CLOUDS ARE SUPERBLOG!!'S FRIENDS. Shout it from the rooftops.)

A little known fact about Fuglesang: his name is an ancient Swedish word that means "Birdsong". As if birds could survive in space! How stupid!

P.S. SUPERBLOG!! has written about Mr Birdsong several times before but I refuse to provide links, on ethical grounds.

SUPERBLOG!!: Anti-Fuglesang, Anti-Stupid, Anti-Space

In the Mood for Hate

The Koala Who Walks Like A MAN!!

Let me tell you how much I've come to hate you since I began to blog. There are 387.44 million miles of printed blog entries in wafer thin layers that fill my apartment. If the word hate was engraved on each nanoangstrom of those hundreds of millions of miles it would not equal one one-billionth of the hate I feel for SUPERBLOG!! fans at this micro-instant for you. Hate. Hate.

Just kidding. (Here's the original Ellison story.)

SUPERBLOG!!: Loving, caring

Now! SUPERBLOG!! Search Engine Go!

It doesn't work very well yet but YOU can make it work better by contributing! Do it and I promise you a new and/or better life. Together we can drive this search engine to the brink of a thousand tomorrows.

Go go go!

SUPERBLOG!!: Join us and/or die

Deconstructing Roy Lichtenstein

This is my favorite website of all time.

SUPERBLOG!!: Easily impressed

Space vs Tenerife

This be corny Christer. He's about to become first Swede in Space and I'm about to be the billion'th Swede on the sunny island of Tenerife. I go there any day now and I've heard that Tenerife is a blog free zone meaning you shouldn't expect anything from me. Biznis as usual that is.

In the thick of a complicated series of tasks to rewire the station - hopefully without serious interruption to the resident crew aboard - will be Sweden's first astronaut, Christer Fuglesang.

Fuglesang said he hoped his flight would inspire Swedes to become more involved in the space programme and encourage young people to study engineering and science.

Most likely he'll get drunk and fuck up the space station and they will push his ass into outer space and everybody will curse his name. Or he'll somehow save the day with a rod.

SUPERBLOG!!: We know how to make boomerangs that come back.

UPDATE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Here's one fucking lank you will go check out. Do it now!!

Evil Comics #11: Marco Polo's Journey of Fucking, Part Four

A FIRM GRIP EMBIGGENS THE SMALLEST PIC

This is the last and crappiest Marco Polo story ever. I probably held off on publishing it for so long because it's so sucky. But pay attention anyway, you might learn something. Parts 1 thru 3 are in the list below.

PREVIOUS EVIL COMICS FOR JERKS
#1: Superblog!!'s Pal, Jimmy Olsen (cover)
#2: Superblog!!'s Girl Friend, Lois Lane (cover)
#3: Jimmy Olsen's Fist of DOOM! (cover)
#4: Marco Polo's Journey of Fucking, Part One
#5: The Origin of Superblog!!, Part One
#6: The Origin of Superblog!!, Part Two
#6½: Countdown to Absolutely Static, Hayfever-Inducing Normality (cover)
#7: Superblog!!'s Bitch, Lois Lame (cover)
#8: Marco Polo's Journey of Fucking, Part Two
#9: The Cleverest One Yet! (cover)
#10: Marco Polo's Journey of Fucking, Part Three

SUPERBLOG!!: First and last and always

Photo #118: Symbolic Extravaganza

This could mean something. I think everything is about the cow. It always is. In psychology text books the above is called bizarre grouping so now you know more than you did 4 seconds ago. First one to interpret correctly will get black baby and crocodile head sent with FedEx.

Hitler Inda Haus!

Thanks, Mook, you YouTube surfer you.

Happy Thanksgiving Retards

But A Monkey Supplied The Glue

Me = genius. And English isn't even my first language! That makes me a SUPER genius. Are you a genius? No, probably not.

Dog eat dog!

A brilliant ad that will make you vote GOP.

I stole the above pic from from scans_daily. It was preceded by these three pages: "Cut Your Dick Off." "All I Got To Do Is Lop Off My Knob?" and "You'll Lose Too Much Blood!"

(And yes, I'm well aware how incredibly annoying the William Shatner song is. I wish there was something I could to, but if I turn it off THE TERRORISTS WIN! You don't want that, do you? Of course not.)

Danny Say Relax

A Very Sexual Movie

It's about sexual love and clothes and doctors and organs and it's very advanced. Everybody talks Swedish!!

The film deals with all kinds of problems connected with the sexual relationship of people. Whilst every question is discussed by the panel., the film illustrates; the difference between male and female sexual organs and their functions, positions, and authentic coition whereby a split screen system is used enabling us to see the various reactions in different parts of the body.

Chat Chat Chat Chat Chat

I Can't Get Behind That!

It´s Awesome!!

This post I posted with my new phone, the HTC TyTn. It´s awesome I tell you. Totally. ´I´ll be one of the rulers in geek world for many weeks! haha! Licorice!

Justin!

James Kochalka Superstar: Britney's Silver Can.

sAM sPAM tO tHE RESCUe!!

hERE's TooDay's feaTured Spam. Me likeD!

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sAM sPam knows lazy blogging like no other..

This Just In: SUPERBLOG!! Still Sucks

Creepiness Week Part 5 or 6 or something

Um. I don't really feel like blogging today either. Maybe Sam Spam will pop in later with something of interest (but I wouldn't hold my breath). This could very well be SUPERBLOG!!'s longest period of suckitude since the start. What do you think? (I don't really care, this was a pathetic attempt at involving the audience.)

Oh, and as expected, I won the drawring contest.

SUPERBLOG!! and You: Partners in Wonder

Creepiness Week Part 4½

Wait a minute! Wasn't Creepiness Week last week? WHAT THE LOVE IS GOING ON?!?

Image stolen from Classic Crime & Horror Covers, a webpage collecting classic crime and horror covers from comical booklets.