I Thought Everything Would Be Different Here in Falun

You remember. The jingles used to go.

Photo #78: That's My Band!

Enjoy The Silence

I will go to Göteborg which is spelled Gothenburg by strange people. Depeche Mode are playing concert in Scandinavium and I will be reporting live from the event. I go now! Bye bye funny people.

Also take a look at picture in this link but be warned! Very very big picture. You must have lots of broadband to watch it eventually. Absurd I tell you. That's how big the picture is but after all you really are getting the big picture on Scandinavium which is where Depeche Mode plays music tonight.
(Don-t miss tall shiny towers in background. The two towers are called Gothia Towers Hotel. I've been drinking large amounts of alcohol in tower to the right. They have big partyplace on top. It was New Years Eve and I saw fireworks. For real I think.)

Photo #77: That's My Bush!

Me in a Billion Years

This is a rare photo of me from the year 1,000,002,006. I shall become a star, and thou shalt worship my countenance; warm, calm, yet piercing.

Me in 100 Years

I'll be dead! And you'll be dead too! :-)

Me in 10 Years

Or maybe 20. I've never been good with numbers. But I promise you that before the world ends, I will do everything in my power to become as much as Leland as I can. I'm already laughing on the outside while crying inside. And the hair is coming along nicely. Yeah, I think together we can pull this off, SUPERBLOG!! readers! I shall be Leland!

SUPERBLOG!! Science Question of the Week! Featuring A Snail!

If you blow your nose while eating a carrot, your snot will emerge orange. True or false? The answer, which SUPERBLOG!! came across accidentally, may surprise you. Join us next week for the answer! Or better yet, have another drink and forget all about it!

Taco Taco Taco Taco Taco Taco and Taco

Me and the mother of my child and my child had dinner guests tonight. I gave them taco's and they ate them and we were all so happy. I was happy too but I knew that I was happy at the expense of SUPERBLOG!! and that made me sad for a while. I now understand that I must get rid of all my friends in order to find time for blogging. Friends steal too much of your time. To hell with friends.

The Phantom Turns 70 Today!

... and why should you care?

Honestly? I have NO fucking idea. But here are a bunch of FUN FACTS to impress your friends (if you HAD ANY) with:

1. The Phantom is inexplicably popular in Scandinavia, of which Sweden is a part. Sweden is the nation wherein SUPERBLOG!! lives and works and sleeps. Sometimes SUPERBLOG!! visits other countries, but it always returns to Sweden eventually. Sweden is a land of vikings and holy men.

2. The text in the pic above is written in Swedish, the official language of Sweden. Basically it says that the Phantom is a chronic masturbator.

3. The Phantom has a wolf named Devil, who is often mistaken for a god.

4. The Phantom's catchphrase is "Do not do evil unto me, my brethren". He has occasion to utter this whenever he runs afoul of a SINGH PIRATE. Singh Pirates are from India. The Phantom is prejudiced against people from India.

5. I generally don't watch much television, because television is for assholes. Real men watch DVDs. But I will now turn on ZTV to catch an episode of The Simpsons. I will smile even if it's an episode I've seen before. But I will not laugh.

6. This blog post is brought to you by the letter K and the number Norrlands Guld.

It's a Lot of Applesauce Now, Bud

This comical comic strip is a metaphore for my life, the universe, and fucking everything.

(It was first published in Adam the Awesome Adam's Apple Crusher Guy #4 (June, 1941).)

You Fucking Assholes!

You know who you are, I need mention no names.

Here's the world's smallest Pacman game.

Photo #76: Non-Fun-Beer

Hallo kameraden! Ich kann im das Germanishen sprache bloggen! Ein volks - Ein blog! SUPERBLOG!! Die beste blogg wirklich! Warte! Ist Jever ein bier von Deutchland? Ich weiss nicht, nein nein. Ich muss das kontrollieren nach Google. Jawohl meinen freunde! Jever ist ein bier von Deutchland Deutchland uber alles!!

Hier ist webkarte! Jever - Keine kompromisse!!

Jever Fun - das alkoholfreie Pilsener. Es so zu brauen, dass der typisch friesisch-herbe Geschmack auch ohne Alkohol nicht auf der Strecke bleibt, hat lange gedauert.

Das ist verdammt! Scheisse sprechen sie! Du musst alkohol haben in ein bier oder du können nicht ein vergnuglichen abend habe.

SUPERBLOG!! - We speak your language unless it's fucking stupid.

Evil Comics #10: Marco Polo's Journey of Fucking, Part Three

STROKE IMAGE GENTLY TO MAKE IT LARGER.

Evil Comics is all about being true to yourself and spreading joy. If you're unfamilar with Marco Polo's adventures, you should probably start with part one and continue with part two and then go back and read the part that is staring you in the face right now, and then you should go to sleep for a great many years and when you wake the sky will be full of flying cars and unhappiness will be a thing of the past, thanks to HAPPYPILLS^TM, which will be distributed via fax machines right into people's homes.

Such is my vision of future life on this planet, and here are all previously published Evil Comics:

#1: Superblog!!'s Pal, Jimmy Olsen (cover)
#2: Superblog!!'s Girl Friend, Lois Lane (cover)
#3: Jimmy Olsen's Fist of DOOM! (cover)
#4: Marco Polo's Journey of Fucking, Part One
#5: The Origin of Superblog!!, Part One
#6: The Origin of Superblog!!, Part Two
#6½: Countdown to Absolutely Static, Hayfever-Inducing Normality (cover)
#7: Superblog!!'s Bitch, Lois Lame (cover)
#8: Marco Polo's Journey of Fucking, Part Two
#9: The Cleverest One Yet! (cover)

Go Denmark!

Look! It's loudspeakers! From Denmark! I decided that Denmark needed my help so I bought these fine loudspeakers and I drank a couple of Elephant beers too. Mmmmm..... loudspeakers.... Jamo D430.
Probably the best speakers money can buy. Unless you spend more money than what I did.

Form that follows function and elegance combined with technology are the keywords for D 4. The slimline design and choice of finishes makes it easy to integrate these speakers in any home. D 430 is a full range standmount speaker that sounds terrific, even without the aid of a subwoofer. Place it on the dedicated D 430FS stand and you have a fantastic solution for both stereo and surround material.

KoalaCam #9: My Friday Night

I'm spending this evening drinking fine Swedish beer, eating Thai flavored potato chips, and reading a comic book I ordered from Japan, via the U.S. This is a kind of freedom my grandfather could probably never have imagined, even if he hadn't turned slightly senile during his last few years. Or, to put it another way: Gee, my life is completely fucking empty, isn't it?

That's not to piss all over the comic book, though. It's awesome. Here's what it's about: Frank is trying to dig up something in his garden and he asks his pet Pupshaw and the pet's friend Pushpaw to help him, but they run away and frolic and stuff until they are discovered by an elephant god baby or something and apparently transported away from their dimension into other places where they accidentally traumatize children and stuff but eventually they return home and help Frank out. The baby elephant god is something of an asshole. Then again, Pupshaw and Pushpaw are also inconsiderate towards Frank until the very end so I guess everybody can change.

Link-O-Rama #5

That's strange. I got a hard-on the size of Sweden by watching a little movie about The Crazy Multi-Input Touch Screen.

Thank God for Goths

I've been feeling kind of low lately so it was very gratifying to pass a couple of goth kids on the way home from work today. No matter how fucking useless and stupid you feel, you can rest assured that you're at least two or three steps higher up the evolutionary ladder than those miserable little self-hating fuckwits. Hey, you glum assholes: Why don't you stop cutting yourselves with pocket knives and try SMILING?! It might even get you laid.

(I say all this knowing full well that at least 30 percent of SUPERBLOG!!'s fans subscribe to the goth religion. But I can't let that stand in the way of revealing the TRUTH. And, anyway, I DID say I'm grateful for their continuing existence. So if anything, they should be flattered.)

Now, to be honest... during a particularly bad day, I might perhaps be mistaken for a goth myself. You know, since I'm dark-haired, dark-eyed, pale, thin, and dress mostly in black. And... you know, read Neil Gaiman and listen to Joy Division and the Cure and stuff.

The main difference between me and goths, however, is that I am AWESOME and they are FILTH.

Eat Your Vegetables!

If you don't I'll make you. But don't become a fucking vegan or any shit like that. You can try to buy that carrot/penis-carrot/balls with attached carrot on eBay but I'm not sure if I can find it again. Search and you will find Jebus says Jebus. Anyways. I need to go to bed now. Tomorrow is big day. I have meeting with famous professor and I shall also work some. I have good work. I get paid for drinking coffee and watching sports on big TV. Tonite I found English language to be very disturbing and that's why I write so stupid. Bear with me. Or hate me. Hate is better than despair. More useful. Arnold says so in T3 and he's a robot. He Robot. Aaaasimoooov!

(I made link now. If I no make link, Koala kills and hires another co-blogging-person.)

UPDATE!! Here carrot link to Koala post too. If I miss make link to Koala shit he says bad things and gets excited in bad ways.)

Me Too! Me now!!!

That was very, very old news.

Go Dollar!! Go Dollar!! We love you!!

Wow, What A Surprise

If I were a book, I would apparently be The Crying of Lot 49, which I haven't read. But I like Pynchon. So yeah.

The questions were kind of stupid. Or clever. It's all the same nowadays.

I KILL YOU

It was the best of times, it was the worst of times. It was the age of wisdom, it was the age of foolishness. It was the spring of hope, the winter of despair, the summer of love, and the fall of the house of Usher. I built that fucking house with my own two hands. And still it fell apart. Whatever.

They're sharpening their knives behind your back even as we speak. Eat me.

A Poem for My Loving Husband

This one's for Matthew. (Just because.)

And for Gerald Hampton. (Turn the volume way up because the Midi file on that page ROCKS.)

******************** Advertisement ********************

BUY ICE CREAM NOW
Have you always wanted to eat ice cream? And to buy it over the Internet? Well, now you can! Or can you? Click me in the face! Do it!

******************** Advertisement ********************

In researching this blog entry I came across a link to a page entitled "Blonde Russian Chick goes for Big Black Dick" which sounds intriguing. (I found it via Interracial Review, my Home page in Explorer.)

Sex Sechs Six

Welcome to the 666th SUPERBLOG!! post. I didn't know what to write about so here are some previous SUPERBLOG!! posts you might enjoy, but probably won't, because, let's face it, most of them suck (but some of them are kind of cool, even if they hang with the wrong crowd - so I guess they're just like me):

Tuesday, June 07, 2005
Satanic Chips

Thursday, June 09, 2005
Burn in Hell!

Friday, June 03, 2005
Photo #23: The Squirrel from Hell

Tuesday, May 31, 2005
Photo #20: Hell on Earth

Friday, July 08, 2005
Not a Chance in Hell

Monday, May 16, 2005
Nerds Shall Burn in Hell

Monday, April 04, 2005
Blogger Sucks Satan's Cock in Hell

Saturday, February 26, 2005
Copacabana Still Sandy as Hell

Monday, January 31, 2005
What the Hell is Lamadjuret?

You'll notice they're all presented in strict chronological order, except some, which aren't.