KoalaCam #13: My Naked Birthday Party

Lo! Forsooth! I am returned from Norrland and will tell you all about it eventually but not today because today is my BIRTHDAY.

I started the celebrations by dancing naked to the tunes of an illegally downloaded mp3 of Cass Elliot's Make Your Own Kind Of Music. And then I had breakfast and watched a bunch of illegally downloaded episodes of Lost naked. It seems like I'm doing everything naked nowadays, but that can't be true, can it? I even make love naked (i. e. condomless), because how else am I to unleash DISEASE upon the world? So far I've resisted the temptation to go to work naked. And it won't happen in a while because I have just begun my VACATION. (If all goes well, I will mostly spend it drinking beer in various places, always nude.)

SUPERBLOG!! Site of the Day: Help Kwala and Grandma Koala make a cake for Boowa's birthday.

SUPERBLOG!! Words of the Day: Birthday. Disease. Vacation.

Now shower me with love.

This Puppy Bites

Axl Rose has been puking in a Swedish detox cell since this morning.

STOCKHOLM, Sweden - Axl Rose was arrested early Tuesday after allegedly biting a security guard in the leg in a hotel scuffle, police said.
The Guns N’ Roses frontman was held on suspicion of attacking and threatening the guard and causing damage to the Berns Hotel, said police spokeswoman Towe Hagg.
“He was deemed too intoxicated to be questioned right away,”

Biting someone in the leg...? How does one end up biting someone in the leg? Is he a man or a mouse? Yes he is.

Photo #97: Fly

It is a fly. It's eating stuff from the table and it makes happy sounds. Wzzzz! Wzzzz!

Photo #93 - 96: Fire Time

Bought that crap when in Duesseldorf.

Never knew until tonight what it was good for....


Haha! Burn crappy German knit wear!

Burn in my Swedish fire!!! Die!!!

Suck My Solstice

Tomorrow is Midsummer's Eve, which is a big deal in Sweden. We erect a giant phallic tree and dance and laugh and sing and eat and drink and fuck and cry. It's a time for celebrating our Old Gods.

For my part, I'm gonna focus on the drinking. But not too heavily, because the day after, I'm attending a wedding, and puking in church stopped being cool some time in the '90s.

All this will take place in Norrland, a barren wasteland, unfit for human life. I hope to return in a few days (unless I get eaten by a moose or something). During my absence, SUPERBLOG!! will be in the sole care of Uncle Scooby. Here's what Unc had to say when I informed him:

I will poo all over the blog

Clearly, SUPERBLOG!! couldn't be in better hands. Now I can drink with a clean conscience.

Photo #92: Hammer Time

I used a sledgehammer today and I liked it so now I must find new things to hammer.

Take That, Svennis!

Sweden-England: 2-2. Quoth the BBC, "England are destined to never beat Sweden ever again." Damn straight.

(For those not in the know, Sven-Göran Eriksson is a traitor to his country. Which is normally something we applaud here on SUPERBLOG!!, but not when it concerns soccer. I mean football.)

Previous World Cub blogging on SUPERBLOG!!:
Sweden-Paraguay: 1-0
Sweden-Trinidad & Tobago: 0-0 (pretty good considering we were playing two nations simultaneously)

I Motivate U

Mr Munkey of Melbourne, Australia, informs us that now you can make your own motivational poster, right here on the Internet!!! It's true! So I did. And here it is. And now you're motivated.

Audience Participation Dept.: Create a poster on which you write SUPERBLOG!! is very good etc etc etc and post it somewhere, or email it or something. The best poster wins a prize!

Fine Print: Employees of SUPERBLOG!!, Inc., are extra eligible to enter and win this contest. In all honesty, I'll most likely keep the prize for myself.

Sing Assholes !!!

I love Dubya, mayonnaise and U2 and all of that is whipped together in this fine tune. Enjoy or die.

Photo #91: Bench

I need more time to sit on my bench. No more serious blogging until August (September?). Just photos. Photos says more than blahblahblah.

And what's happening in the life of Uncle Sammy? Well, today I assembled a garden bench !! It was very exciting and I really thought it worked out well. Phew...!

I'm a Game Boy !!!

Today I've been doing feng-shui! Lots of porn left the building and some furniture too. That made me all tired so I sat down for a couple of hours playing Mr. Do !!!!

You are a clown who moves around a maze. You can dig new paths to avoid monsters and collect cherries. Kill monsters with a 'powerball' or drop apples on them. Kill them all or eat all the cherries to go up a level.

So it is. The best games mirrors real life. I often feel like a clown moving around in a maze.

Worth mentioning: dedicated fans might have noticed that we are linking to bloggtoppen.se which is a place for the ranking of Swedish blogs. To be included we promised in some form that some of our content should in a way or two be related to Sweden or something like that. I'll make it appear like that by teaching you some Swedish.

You sir, are an ass hat !
Du herrn är en stjärthatt!

SUPERBLOG!! makes me horny and I have a really big penis.
SUPERBLOGG!! gör mig kåt och jag har en riktigt stor penis.

This apple is red.
Detta äpple är rött.

Will now eat sausages and watch more soccer. Italy vs USA. Forza USA.

Selected Memories from Duesseldorf: Starbucks

Just kidding. It's true that I took the above picture when me and fellow SUPERBLOG!!ger Ugly Sambo visited Naziland, but I have no intention of trying to remember when and where and why I did. Hence, no memories to share.

I suffer from an affliction. Today it is causing me to walk around nude in my unnecessarily large apartment, clutching a beer in my claw-like left hand, and occasionally taking a sip. It is Friday afternoon, and I am bored. I've lived in stupid Falun the better part of a year now, and it's starting to dawn on me that this town is for shitheads. I am not a shithead, so what the hell am I doing here?

Sverige!

Sverige is Swedish for Sweden, which is where DEN SVENSKE KOCKEN comes from. Lying on the table is Paraguay. Eat shit! World Cup! Football! Woo!

KoalaCam #12: The Key to Nature

I had reason to visit the proud city of Avesta a while ago, and couldn't help noticing the interesting symbol they use in ads and on billboards. As you can see, it's a big, fat KEY. Presumably the key unlocks many mysteries.

Caress the picture to enlarge it.

Jesus Wept

Sweden vs Trinidad-Tobago 0 - 0

What's the matter with you Swedish super heroes? Can't score?

Now we must beat Paraguay and we must fuck Svennis in the ass.....

SUPERBLOG!! fans all over the world.... Pray for us !!

Goooooooooooooaaaaal !!!!!

Soccer !! Soccer !! Suckers !!

Fifa World Cup has started and I've decided to sink myself deep into the soccer swamp this year. Sweden digged gold in the US in 1994 but won bronze and I drank beer in Norrköping 1994 and I swam in fountains. What a coincidence!!

They're playing the ball in Germany and Germany is close to Sweden which you must know by now. I promised myself last year that I should go to Germany to watch a couple of games but I rarely keep my promises. See you tomorrow. Must drink chicken beer now. Chicken beer is a must when you enjoy a good soccer game.

I Said, Bow Down Before the Glory of Sweden or Feel the Wrath of the Cenobites!

The SUPERBLOG!! family! Left to right: Uncle Sammy, Koala Mentala, Baby Sam (Sammy's daughter), Moocko (Koala's prag monkey).

The resemblance is uncanny.

Bow Down Before the Glory of Sweden or Feel the Wrath of the Cenobites

Greetings, disgusting SUPERBLOG!! readers! How are you on this fine day? Not too well, I hope. Here's the thing: since my co-blogger is a lazy son of a bitch, he asked me to blog about the connection between the Swedish National Day (which is today) and Satan. You see, he's discovered that today's date is the 6th of June, 2006, or 6/6/6. (Yeah, I know - it doesn't make much sense. But still.)

So anyway, to celebrate our proud National Day, I've stayed in and watched Hellbound: Hellraiser II on DVD. But now I'm gonna go out in the sun. To buy beer. And more DVDs. And maybe some dinner, because I hunger!

The movie gets two Michael Keatons, but surely it would have been three if I'd had beer to drink while watching it.

To Hell and Back

I'm gonna keep this short. My daughter (Baby Sam) got very very very sick some weeks ago. When we asked the doctor at the ICU something like: Okey, but she's gonna make it, right?

The doctor said something like: I'm not so sure about that. And 0.43 seconds later I was in hell and I stayed there for like 10 days and now I'm slowly coming back because Baby Sam is recovering just fine.

What happened to her? Septic shock caused by Pneumococcus, a very ordinary bacteria that by some freakish bad luck managed to enter the blood stream where it caused mayhem until stopped by antibiotic miracle drugs.

SUPERBLOG!! Friends: Mr Tumnus

My home is being haunted by a prag monkey, and said monkey has an irrational fear of fauns, so this SUPERBLOG!! entry is an attempt to drive it away. Begone, prag monkey!

Hey! Why drink tasty yet inexpensive beer in the comfort of your home when you can go out on the town and pay exorbitant prices for crappy, watered-down brew at some boring place for stupid hicks? That's my philosophy and that's why I'm out of here.

Blank Post Friday

Feel Weird Today

Here's a disjointed paragraph: I went away again. This time I spent a few days on an island. But now I'm back - more evil than ever. There's some kind of event in town but I can't be bothered to investigate further. Uncle Sammy's comet wounds seem to have healed up. Yesterday, Swedish police hit The Pirate Bay, the world's largest BitTorrent tracker. But they have yet to bring down SUPERBLOG!!'s Site of the Day.

Fucking Finns. Someone should do something.