Good news, everybody! I ran into Danny Trejo at the mall yesterday and asked him if Machete is ever going to get made and he was all like "OMG DUDE ARE YOU KIDDING ME?! IT'S SO F***ING ON!!!!!!" and then he asked me over to his house where we had a few drinks and his wife made quiche, and we quickly bonded so after a while he said I was like part of the family now so he asked if I maybe wanted a cameo in the movie or something!! I said, SURE, if it's no big trouble, and he said "NO WAY DUDE!!!!!! I'LL TALK TO ROBERT ABOUT IT RIGHT NOW!!!" He phoned up Robert Rodriguez just there and then even though it was the middle of the night cos he said Robert's ALWAYS up late working anyway but I don't know about that because Danny put him on speaker phone and I thought he sounded like we just woke him up. So I was a little nervous about it and told Danny to just hang up and forget about it. But Danny said "RELAX DUDE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" and he talked to Robert about it and Robert said it was TOTALLY okay, in fact he's gonna write a pretty big part as a pimp JUST for me as a thankyou for like being a total fan and also (now) a good friend of Danny's.
So I'm hesitantly optimistic about Machete getting made, and and later this week me and Danny are going to play bridge with Cheech Marin and Quentin Tarantino and we are going to totally KICK THEIR ASS!!!!!!
More info here.
9 comments:
Koala as a pimp! Yay!
How did you come across that message board? That was hilarious. "Trejo came over and signed an actual machete!"
Trejo himself phoned me last night and was all like "DUDE!! YOU'VE GOT TO CHECK OUT THIS MESSAGE BOARD!!!" Then I asked if it was okay if I blogged about it and he said, "YOU GOTTA DO WHAT YOU GOTTA DO MAN!!!!"
I was walking to my car and Danny Trejo jumped out of some bushes, sans shirt and a left shoe and said that "MACHETE IS DEFINITELY GOING TO GET MADE!" I was so stoked that I didn't mind it when he forced me down and had sex with my mouth!
I haven't met him personally yet, but I saw Mr. Trejo at the grocery store yesterday, talking to the guy at the counter: "IT IS GETTING MADE! MEGA-PROMISES, MAN!" The guy at the counter said: "Who are you?"
I kept a distance.
"Mega-promises"? Doesn't sound too likely. I bet that wasn't Danny Trejo at all.
Matthew's story rings true, though. Especially since Danny texted me this morning to complain about losing his left shoe recently. Apparently it's making his sexual attacks on strangers "all lopsided and shit".
No, you're right. It wasn't Danny Trejo, but Danny Trejo's brother!! He walked up to me when I was going home with groceries and said "LET ME HANDLE THOSE" and then we walked home to him and had tacos, and later DANNY HIMSELF joined us and showed his new MACHETE-tatoo. Appareantly, it was Robert Rodriguez youngest son who had made it and he's going to star in the follow-up to MACHETE - SON OF MACHETE. Just when I was going to go home and cut som slack after all the Mexican beer, Danny slipped me a 5-DISC DVD EDITION of MACHETE signed by him, his brother and Robert Rodriguez' son, which he said wouldn't be in stores for like 100 million years! Boy, was I lucky!
What were you doing in a mall?
What was I not doing?
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