Sunday, December 16, 2007

The Year of Watching DVDs, Part 34: Schle Collection + Related


I watched the entire IMDb top 250 list and now I'm watching everything else. All reviews so far.

Hello and welcome to another installment of this insanely popular SUPERBLOG!! feature. This time, it's all about a limited distribution DVD collection I got my hands on, called The Schle Collection. It contains a variety of movies, most of them fairly mediocre (none of them get more than 3 Keatons). But they were still a pleasure to watch! Also, some of the DVDs directly led the way to other movies I wanted to see, which I'll list here, even though they're not part of the Collection proper.


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Good Plus
Blood Diamond (2006) (repeat): Previously reviewed in Part 17/18.
Kunglig toilette (1986) & Potatishandlaren (1996) (repeat)
Whale Rider (2002): Actress was also in SW3, see bottom of the list.

Good

Blood Work (2002): Eastwood in an oldskool detective story with an 00s sensibility. A tad too many touches of sentimentality and I guess it's pretty implausible, but it's just so NICE. Completely laid back, and most of it takes place in daylight.
Children of Men (2006) (repeat): Previously reviewed in Part 10.
Chocolat (2000) (repeat)
Honogurai mizu no soko kara / Dark Water (2002)
Leende guldbruna ögon (2007) (mini series, 3 episodes)
New Nightmare (1994): Fifty percent Elm Street, fifty percent Scream.
A Nightmare on Elm Street (1984) (repeat)
A Nightmare on Elm Street 3: Dream Warriors (1987): Either the best or the second-best Elm Street.
Ocean's Eleven (2001)
Ocean's Thirteen (2007): Completely ridiculous, but great fun.
This Is England (2006): About a tiny little skinhead. Nicely realized, if surprisingly lightweight.


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Strong Okay
Babel (2006): I liked it, but I also hated in a little bit. Here are some selections from 1000 thing that i learned watching 'Babel':

30. When a Mexican nanny learns that her charges' mother has been shot, is going into surgery, and may be near death, she will immediately take those children out of the country and render them incommunicado for the next 24 hours, thereby ensuring that (at the very least) she will lose her job.
31. When a tour group of Westerners sees one of their group shot and in life-threatening circumstances, no member of the group will show any regard whatsoever for the well-being of the victim. They will instead leave her to die, citing vague fears about the surroundings and the need to take their medicine.
32. When Morrocan police investigating a shooting encounter persons of interest who try to flee, they will open fire with intent to kill and continue to fire even after the suspects are pinned down, ensuring they will never discover the perpetrator. However, when they eventually get some return fire from a 13-year-old novice shooter, the Morrocan police will cease fire, cower behind cars, and wait for the suspects to surrender.
33. In Morroco, only ambulances can take injured people to hospitals. For some reason, tour buses, police SUVs, and cars will not work.
46) cells phones are just a myth, nobody uses them, actually.
57) don't give marrocans stuff, they WILL sell them
82. When you can't travel 4 hours to a hospital, travel 1 hour to the nearest underdeveloped village and wait there for 10.
92.It's tough to be deprived of hearing, more so than you'd think.

The Hunted (2003)
Wimbledon (2004)

Okay
Assault on Precinct 13 (2005)

Beerfest (2006) (repeat): Reviewed in Part 15.
Bullitt (1968): I don't think I get it.
Captain Corelli's Mandolin (2001)
Coach Carter (2005): I gave it an entire blog post in Part 32!
Cold Mountain (2003)
Dances with Wolves (1990)
The Exorcism of Emily Rose (2005): Starring Dexter's sister.
Friday the 13th Part 2 (1981): Pretty much the perfect encapsulation of so many slasher movie clichés. bathing naked in the middle of the night, "I'll be right back", and so on. And you just know that the guy in the wheelchair has to buy it, cos Jason is an equal opportunity killer.
Inspector Morse: The Death of the Self (1992) (TV movie)
Jackass: The Movie (2002)
Lucky Number Slevin (2006): Reasonably entertaining, but annoyingly "clever". The dialogue brings to mind Moonlighting (you know, were everything was said three times). On the plus side, I did learn the word ataraxia.
Ocean's Eleven (1960)
Ocean's Twelve (2004): I dislike Julia Roberts playing herself and all the "coincidences" (Catherine Zeta Jones just happens to be the oops that would be a spoiler).
One Hour Photo (2002)
Prime Suspect 4: Inner Circles (1995) (TV movie)
Secret Window (2004): Slow and less than engaging Stephen King adaptation. It's a little unusual to see an actor of Johnny Depp's caliber do something this bland.
Shall We Dance (2004)
Sweet Home Alabama (2002): Likable romantic comedy. The ending is a foregone conclusion.
Tears of the Sun (2003)

Weak Okay
Firewall (2006)
Gothika (2003): Partly effective thriller that falls apart completely in the last act.

It (1990) (miniseries, 2 episodes): Oh, that fucking clown. Interesting: Image Google for [stephen king it] and you get a suggestion to try [pennywise].

The Passion of the Christ (2004) (repeat): An insane man is brutally tortured for 90 minutes. Is that supposed to be edifying in some way? Competently made, but sick and disgusting. I recommend South Park's "The Passion of the Jew" as a companion piece.


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Bad
Eight Crazy Nights (2002): Sucky animated feature with Adam Sandler.
Freddy vs. Jason (2003): A very good review.
Friday the 13th (1980): This one too.
A Nightmare on Elm Street Part 2: Freddy's Revenge (1985): It's not much of a revenge when it's different people he's harassing, is it? It's good that instead of going the Friday way and just repeating the same plot, they tried for a different approach. It's bad that it's not good.
Star Wars: Episode III - Revenge of the Sith (2005): I like the way General Grievous (see picture at the top) looks and moves. That's about it.

7 comments:

spidercrazy said...

I just realized there's only two weeks left of the year. After that, no more reviews? I have to think for myself? Scary.

Koala Mentala said...

Yup.

mookster said...

The Passion of the Christ-review = LOL

Koala Mentala said...

Why are you never logged in, Mookster?!?! How can we know you are the TRUE Mookster?!?!

Moocko said...

I AM the real Mookster. No-logged-in-Mookster is my soulless otherwordly Christian spirit part.

Matthew said...

You didn't like the final battle between Obi Wan and Darth Vader? I...I don't...there aren't words.... Koala...you're breaking my heart.

Koala Mentala said...

I'm sure there were other things I liked about the film than the silly design of Grievous but I honestly can't think of a single one. I have a pretty low tolerance for crap. Such is my curse.