I have returned from the idioticest Bizni Ztrip evah. It was pretty stupid.
I was gonna embed some more music in this post mostly to annoy but I thought the blog was annoying enough as at is.
Bonus Brass Eye YouTube clips: Good AIDS or Bad AIDS? and Pedophile questioned and Beat Off. 60 years before Ali G!
The shampoo in my hotel room keeps multiplying. Two days ago there were two bottles of shampoo and yesterday there were three bottles and today there are five bottles. This scares me beyond belief.
Today I drank a few glasses (3? 4?) of free wine and then I drank a lot of bottles of free beer and then I was charming. And then they all abandoned me, when I was CLEARLY in need of assistance. I was barely able to walk home and buy some potato chips and check into my hotel room and blog about my experiences. That's how drunk I was!
Oh yeah and I saw some featureless mannikins on my way home and they scared the living daylights out of me.
World's greatest game. If your opinion differs, there's really nothing to say but fuck you.
Large-breasted virgin Keeley Hazell celebrates her 22nd birthday today. Evil, jealous women sometimes claim that Keeley's large natural breasts are in fact large fake breasts (as if that would somehow invalidate them). But that is just evil talk, and jealousy.
Her virginal status, though, may be a question of Clintonian definition. (WARNING: Link may feature cocksucking.)
There is a rumor going around town that, in the upcoming Swedish remake of Christopher Nolan's The Dark Knight, the part of the Joker will be played by famous thespian Magnus Härenstam. Mr Härenstam is well-known in Northern Europe for his controversial children's program I Have More Ants Than You Have Balls, And Bigger Too and for hosting Jeopardy.
Some of the information in this blog post is entirely true, and all of the links make some kind of sense. If you figure everything out a larger pattern will be revealed.
Nuts plus a balloon plus beer. That equals par-tay!
Not only is it a topical and timely photograph but the composition is wonderful and the picture quality is excellent.
Here is a photo I took of a famous actor named Nicolas Cage. Actually it's a photo of a poster with Nicolas Cage. Or actually it's probably a digital reproduction of a printing that features a digital painting of Nicolas Cage, or something. Everything's digital these days, and people are scared. They look to Nicolas Cage for support, but he's off fighting mummies or whatever.
The point is that I own this photograph and if you want to use it you have to pay me money.
I haven't figured out what the theme for this week's SUPERBLOG!! posts is yet so bear with me while I post a picture of Count Chocula and try to rack my brains. Suggestions are of course welcome.*
From the September 5th episode of The Daily Show: a short but accurate biography of presidential candidate John McCain. Narrated by Ian McShane!* (Here he is again! And again!)
(Official link and alternate download location, in case YouTube removes it. Or, you know, you can just torrent the episode.)
*That rhymes.
You know, one pretty bad thing about this blog is that it repeatedly makes light of human tragedies. I could link to plenty of examples but I'm too ashamed.
The reason behind [Frank Miller & Jim Lee's] All-Star Batman & Robin the Boy Wonder’s recall revealed! The censor bars didn’t print properly a whole bunch of times! Cusswords are visible!
[...]
One has to wonder why they’d bother typing out the offending words in the first place, as it runs the risk of exactly this sort of thing happening with no apparent benefit.
Update: At the risk of spoiling part of the joke, I think I can answer that last question: The reason is that the censor bars aren't really supposed to obscure the profanity entirely. Since most readers of the book are likely adults, they're meant to be able to figure out exactly what the words are, by looking at the visible parts of the letters. DC Comics just don't have the balls to print the words legibly. (It's similar to how bad language on South Park is only partially bleeped. You can still make out the words, you just can't hear them clearly.)
Friday Update: Los Angeles Times interviews Frank Miller about the debacle.
The laziest and boring-est SUPERBLOG!! posts are the ones where we take a stupid quiz or test or whatever and post the results as if it counted as actual blogging. This post is a pretty good example.
Welcome back to Worst Blogging Week Ever, a celebration of the worst things about SUPERBLOG!!
Another of the worst (also best) things about SUPERBLOG!! is our tendency to suddenly post NSFW* stuff with little to no provocation.
Case in point: English environmentalist Keeley Hazell.
(*We generally avoid pictures that show genitalia but even that policy was violated in the Sex Dog posts and arguably in the Vagina Dentata post and possibly elsewhere.)
Apparently there's an election coming up in October and I sure hope George W Bush (coincidentally the worst president ever!) gets voted out of the White House! Until then, here are some images from around the web that show how stupid and/or evil Bush really is:
Yeah baby! As promised! Tremble before the awesome might of the worst bloggy week in SUPERBLOG!! history. It begins today! It continues tomorrow! It ends on Sunday.
HOW HARD CAN U SUCK?
Typical: I proclaim this week Lazy Blogging Week on Monday, and follow that by posting more frequently than I have in many months. That's so fucking SUPERBLOG!!. (Is what I would say if it wasn't an extremely nerdy thing to say.) (And Lord knows I'm no nerd. I'm cooler than cool. My code name in the CIA would be Cold Fish. Secret Agent Cold Fish.) (Illustration.) Not only have the posts been frequent, but they've all been of stellar quality. Maybe too good. So to even things out, I want to announce that next week on SUPERBLOG!! will be Worst Blogging Week Ever. See you there and then.
p.s. Some links:
I used to dislike Fox News but now I think they are awesome! Chutzpah! is the word. Or childishness.
For Swedes: Obama Academy!
Worst comic strip ever: Loki, Your Fuzzy Forest Friend
I haven't seen Incredible Hulk yet, is it any good? Is it ass? Hulk had the right idea: Smash the fucking world! He's like Osama bin Laden, but not limited to Western civilization. Thus even more hardcore! I don't even know what I'm talking about. Smashing isn't good. Just so I won't be aiding smashing financially, I'll wait for the R5.
I know I posted the Hulk picture because I had something to say, but I forgot what it was (it wasn't about terrorism or piracy). Fuck it.
British TV is like a shit that comes out sideways. It's tightly packed and lovingly crafted, full of proteins and fully-digested solids.
American TV is more like the eager watery rush that follows a meal of asparagus, coffee beans, and sunflower oil.
There's more of it, but some things should be judged by the quality of the experience rather than rapidity and volume.
- a polyamorous young man
Also pictured: Jennifer Love Hewitt.
You can see it here but if it's too much work to click on the link you can just lift your eyes a little bit.
Since SUPERBLOG!! is Lazy this week, I decided to use my awesome blogging powers elsewhere. First of all I started a blog for famous actor Garret Dillahunt. I call it the Garret Dillahunt Blog. Hope you enjoy it.
It's a very special week here at SUPERBLOG!!: Lazy Blogging Week! As you know, my co-blogger Unky Sucky has been training for this special occasion for at least a year so he's got a head start. But it might take some getting used to for me.
